Gralyn J. Photography

Beautiful. When I was a kid I heard it all the time, how beautiful I was. Now that I'm older I continue to hear it, not near as much because I'm a young woman, but still. Is it ok to think of YOURSELF as beautiful/handsome? You all know that one person that thinks its a privilege to be around them and that scared you, you never wanted that. You know, that person with the big ego (Maybe even a big truck). They think they're all that; Smart, pretty/handsome, talented, the list goes on. Everytime I'm around one of these people I think "Wow they really are confident, why can't I have that?", but is it confidence? Or narcissism? In Greek mythology, Narcissus was a hunter from Thespiae who was known for his looks. He was proud, in that he disdained those who loved him. Narcissus was drawn to a pool, where he saw his own reflection in the water and fell in love with it. Unable to leave the beauty of his reflection, Narcissus lost his will...

I'm sore all over from working a job I actually enjoy for once, and not sleeping at night because I'm panicking about life. No reason in particular, just the fact that I have no idea what the heck I'm doing. I'm 20, fresh out of teenage hood and finished my first year of schooling, now beginning to doubt everything I've ever thought about in life. I had a recent set back which took me back to when I was alone and scared. My parents were divorced and not speaking which made it tough for me to get any information to or from them. I found a group I thought would help and they did for a while... Until everything went wrong. I lost friends, connections, and people I thought I could genuinely trust in my life. Why is this affecting me now? I have no idea. It's something that still hasn't left me. It still keeps me up at night- Why would someone do these things? Why did this happen? What could I have done to stop it? It put me back in 16 year old me's s...

I am sitting before work going through Facebook, scrolling like most people do, finding people I went to high school with and some I've never met. Their feeds are full of parties, concerts, friends and just all around fun. I wish I could do this. I wish I could go to work without getting nervous. I wish I could go to take photos without throwing up. I wish I could watch intense movies that make your heart race and you cry your eyes out. I wish I could go to places with loud music. I wish I could get off my butt and take my dog for a walk without feeling sick about leaving the house. I'm tired of anxiety. I don't want to have to keep searching for new medication, or have people tell me it's all in my head. I'm tired of people asking me if I'm ok. I'm tired if people asking me if I "can do this". I'm tired of feeling sick. I'm tired of not going out. I'm tired of limiting my choices. I'm tired of people looking at m...

 I am so excited. I also haven't really been ranting lately, Oops! But oh well, I have been writing since I was really little. Before I could spell I was writing stories and I finally published a book! Then another!     Running From Survival was the third book I ever wrote. My first one was started when I was in Elementary school and I was bullied so badly for wanting to be a writer that I gave up. I put the pencil down and played sports for a while, like people wanted me to. I played lots of soccer, I worked on art, school of course, and worked around the farm. When I reached middle school we started different writing projects, all of which I got full marks in. It re-ignited the passion that I had for writing and I started again. Short stories about haunted summer camps, vampires, and lost creatures from other dimensions caught my friends interests and kept them reading, which kept me writing. One of my friends wanted to use the first book in the sequence, 'Ibli...

    Alright, so today I am going to go through my new job; Highlights, some low lights and the overall experience of being a school photographer.     In the last month I have been traveling to various schools in my area to take school day photos--ages Kindergarten to grade 12. WOW! What an experience it has been.     I am going to try and balance the high and low lights just to keep it nice and even.     The kids are by far my favorite part- depending on the age group. High schools are very tough for me because what I experience in high school was stress, about everything! So going back into the schools was nerve wracking, but dealing with teenagers was even more so. One of my first days on the job I was set up and ready to shoot so I asked my boss about the rule on hats for the day. As usual it was first shot without, and second shot with. So that's how I shot--Until I got to the grade 12's. Yikes. I sat one guy down...

Sometimes you can remedy things on your own, but others you need a little help.      For the last three years I've landed myself in a hospital bed for chest pains so bad I thought I was having a heart attack.                --Just Kidding, it was anxiety-- So I was put back onto the same meds I was on before, they tackled anxiety as well as the depression symptoms that I was showing. After nearly two months of being back on them I was still not sleeping, not eating properly and not able to answer simple questions without crying or getting angry. So I tried a new doctor after I got a new job and was stressing out even more about the little things in life, and stuff that was actually supposed to be stressful (Like hating your new job). Hiking has become so much more regular again, which is nice now that our valley isn't engulfed in wildfire smoke. Photos have taken over my life! I love ...

    Wholly cow I'm published! I can't believe it.     I've been writing since before I could even spell, my journals from school were filled with short stories.     When I got into middle school I wrote for fun, constantly going over my novellas looking for things to be improved. My friend would take the books and read them over and over again, constantly waiting for me to come out with new and exciting adventures. She will be the first one with a copy.     The book I've published (finally) was in the works for the past six years and has been read over by a number of different friends and editors, I'm hoping you all like it... https://www.amazon.com/dp/1520575394?ref_=pe_870760_150889320 Photo provided by gralynjphotos.wix.com/official

I can honestly say I've never been so exhausted in my life. After being on medication for nearly a year I felt that I was in a strong enough place to stop and be ok on my own. I went three months without my medication before I began feeling exhausted and run down all the time. I watched TV until 12 sometimes 2 in the morning to escape my thoughts, I didn't sleep when I tried and studying was a chore. After my week of exams I started working full time hours again, which at my job was easy to do because my coworkers (boss included) were so damn wonderful. But my sleep continued to be patchy and out of sorts, forcing me back into the doctors office. I asked about my sleep and the all around patterns I had been seeing in myself, landing myself back on my original medication and dosage. After an array of flu symptoms and a numb face, I went to see a different Dr because mine wasn't in the office. After pokes and prodes it was determined that I hadn't had a stoke. Yay? Bu...